Swallowing Victory
October 22, 2012

Jordan swallowed today; we actually saw it about 3 different times, which is a great sign of progress! We have only seen him swallow 2 other times in the prior 18 days. However, after 19 days, I never imagined we would still be waiting and watching and wondering. The hardest part right now isn't even having Jodan in NICU as much as having no idea what is causing the issues he is experiencing. Today, he again began looking pale, breathing heavy and shallow, and acting extremely lethargic. His nurse called the Nurse Practitioner on call, who called the doctor, who called the ENT, and even with additional testing no one has any idea what is happening. That means we wait for something to change, which means we can't really be proactive or prepare for the future because we don't even know about tomorrow. The doctor says we need to be patient and to just give it time. I agree with her that it is better not to do surgery or anything else that puts Jordan at risk if he can possibly "grow" out of this by developing...but it is so hard not to be able to do anything for him.

Right now, I continue to spend most of my days at the hospital and that is taking a toll on the other kids. Aaron is having an especially difficult time and has started acting out at his Grandma, particularly when she tries to take him away from Mom. I am really worn out as well, but I am sustained by wonderful family and friends and others who are willing to give time and support when I may not even know them. I honestly can't believe how anxious everyone is to serve and I only hope I will get the opportunity to repay this kindness in some way.

Michael holding Jordan: